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right

then how do you think i could fake having that
so i could pretend it is for my sake and not his

[ Apparently it took just.. nothing for Chizuru to just be willing to do that for someone she cares about.. Casually faking a fatal illness, no biggie. ]

you have to cough a lot and not breathe very well sometimes you cough blood and are very pale

yes i recognize those symptoms
but it would be a little hard to fake that right

i mean the coughing part is easy
but i do not know how i could suddenly cough blood
unless i would injure myself

[ And that just doesn't seem like a good idea to Chizuru.

She at least has some common sense. ]

snowberry they um you can make thick juice with them and they're red like blood

i guess i will have to look for those then when i go home
or um
i suppose i should say if i go home
i am not really sure if that will ever happen
but being prepared to help out a friend the moment i am back cannot hurt i guess

Any kind of red berry will work too but i only know snowberries very well anymore do you want to go back?

[ .. that's a slightly deeper question at the end there, huh.

But Chizuru knows the answer. ]

yes

i have met a whole lot of kind people here
but this place is really scary and awful
and i have something to do back home
i cannot just abandon my duty
so if i could go home i would

[I have something to do back home. I cannot just abandon my duty]

[Oh.]

[The weird stab of guilt is new. Guilt over what he wants. What he knows he'd try to choose, given the chance.]

i understand im sorry you arent there but also glad you are here

you are glad i am here
?

[ The rest of it she can understand, but this part.. ]

why
?

because we are friends right?

of course we are

[ At least there's no hesitance in answering that. The concept of friendship may have been relatively new to Chizuru here, but she's fully embraced the fact she has friends now. And Melius is definitely one of them. ]

i just

i am sorry maybe this sounds odd
but i just did not imagine you were actually glad i am here

[ Look, people appreciating her presence is.. a new concept for Chizuru too, okay...

She's trying to learn to get used to it.. ]

huh ?

[???? ERROR 404 LOGIC NOT FOUND]

[Okay, more seriously. If Chizuru can't understand why people would appreciate her, Melius... can't really understand that. She's done a lot. She's been a good friend. An actual friend, and not just one who he'd done a favor for, or had been assigned to him by some jarl. (Those poor warriors wasting away in their homes because the Argonian couldn't conceive of asking someone else to get hurt with him).]

well i mean

[ ...

Give her a second. This is hard to put into exact words even for her, but she's trying.. ]

i enjoy spending time with you
and talking to you
but i did not want to presume that you necessarily feel the same way
that would not be very nice of me

Oh oh but um if I didn't want to I would hide ?? and not talk to you?

[ Hold on. ]

you would
hide
?????

[ Clearly this is more important than anything else in this moment. Because that feels a little extreme, even by Melius standards. ]

well yes I do that sometimes when there are rude customers then Sasuke or Aakhahnu talks to them

[ ...

Well, it's not like she can't imagine it.. ]

i see
in that case
thank you for your kind feelings towards me
i feel very grateful that you look upon me so kindly

[It's usually the dragon, and she usually has a lot to say on the subject of Trench Karens.]

why um why wouldn't I do that?

do you think everyone looks upon me kindly
?

why wouldn't they?

not everyone is that nice
some people just like hurting others
regardless of what those others are like

so when you realise people like that exist too
you appreciate it even more when people go out of their way to be kind to you
that is why i want to be grateful for your kind heart

oh right those people I guess I just got used to being here with friends

i am glad to hear that
it is what you should be used to
someone kind like you should only be surrounded by kind people

I dont know I don't think I am that

too late

[ Wow, how ominous a text, what will follow? ]

i already think you are

[ Oh. ]

(no subject)

fusrodaaaah - 2023-01-15 23:30 (UTC) - Expand